I have received a ton of email lately about an important topic: the query letter.
Whether it’s an email query or an actual letter sent via snail mail, should we bother sending them, and what actually do we send when we do? Well, the short answer is “Yes!” you should definitely send these out. But what actually do we put into those communiques to elicit the best possible response?
One of my all-time favorite writers is Kathy Hepinstall, a successful novelist, and now a successful screenwriter with a very bright future. She wrote recently to offer her opinion on the subject:
“I think it’s extremely important how query letters are written. For example, when I was peddling my first novel, I sent around a query letter that began something like this:
Dear ____
I have written a literary novel, about 80,000 words, set in Louisiana in 1941, about a very peculiar bordello, run by men….(blah blah blah)
Not a bad query letter. I got 10 percent response. Then I really started thinking about query letters. They are really small pieces of advertising. As such, they must get the agent’s attention in the first sentence in the most compelling way possible, or you’ve lost them, because literary agents receive buckets full of query letters.
So I rewrote it. Second query letter began: What happens when a woman finds out her own rapist has been put in charge of her spiritual recovery?
Got triple the response rate from that query letter: 30 percent. From those responses, I sent my manuscript to a very respected agent, who sold my novel in three days. So that’s the advice I’d offer – make the query letter as compelling as you can in the very first sentence.”
Screenwriter Ben Frahm connected with his current representatives through email query; he got about 4 to 5 responses from over 100 he sent. It sounds like a small number, but he had a good hook. As a result of this and a lot of hard work, Ben sold Dr. Sensitive to Universal and Tom Shadyac last year in a spec sale.
Point is: it works. But I’d like to hear more tips from writers who’ve sent these email and letter queries out to the Hollywood community — and even agents, managers and producers who’ve received them — to learn what approach works best, and what actual words and sentences get the best results. Please chime in!
Looking forward to my Screenwriting Expo appearance next Friday morning at 11. It’s called “Supercharged!” and I am supercharging my speech as we speak. Have a great weekend everyone!
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I think that anything that can be engaging about yourself will help catch the attention. I don’t mean in the sense of inflicting your biography on the letter-reader, but rather those little things that demonstrate your own sense of self and panache. The query is not really the time to be completely self-effacing, as I think one of the things the readers are also subconsciously looking for are signs of whether or not the writer is someone they’re willing to spend years interacting with.
A few years ago, I sent a query to one agent – by snail mail. It was a pretty good letter, and he called me to follow up on it. We had a good 20 minute conversation. Toward the end, he said that one thing that had prompted him to call was my artistic signature. I had developed my signature back in college, and had basically designed it to be a legible flourish. It has become natural to me. But that incident reminded me that although we cannot predict for sure just what may snag the reader’s attention, it never hurts to convey our individuality in natural ways. Don’t get too wound up and stiff.
So it follows that the query letter basically writes itself, because after reading your books and blogs, we wouldn’t dare start the time and energy-consuming task of writing a screenplay without first coming up with a hook that captivates anyone we’ve pitched it to!
I think you’re advice is right on Blake, hook the reader.
Whether it’s your logline, hypothetical or even how you know the person (We spoke at a pitchfest, I was the guy with the crazy green hair like my main character and you laughed!).
Pick the best and go with it. Your email is a numbers game so make it count when eyes glance over it.
Hope to see you at Expo, Blake.
This is what you want to see in your inbox: “This sounds really funny. Great pitch. Please send us the script.” Break it down to the basics in the query: 1. Great logline 2. Know your genre 3. Good synopsis (not too wordy) 4. All about you in two sentances or less 5. How to get in touch
Be different, be brief, be bold.
I made the mistake of pitching my ideas before they were finished early on.
I introduced myself in the first paragraph and gave 3 short log-lines. I sent emails to 5 production companies, and I got one yes. Of course, it was for the script I was least working on, and so that was a fail on my part. I’ve been trying to rush it now and force it, but am willing to take a black mark and work on my most commercial idea first.
Thanks for the advice as always, Blake!
When it comes to query letters, dazzle them with simplicity! A great idea (logline) will always sell, but don’t let errors or cheap paper detract from your idea. Limit your query letter to ONE page, and resist the urge to do something cute, like write your letter on Strawberry Shortcake stationery, or include cash! (BIG no-no.) I’m a novelist, but the same rules apply across the board. I remember an editor saying that he once opened a query letter to find it full of confetti and glitter; a year later he was still picking glitter out of his keyboard! This is a business for every other player in the industry–writers should treat it as a business, too. The first question the person reading your query letter asks is, “Is this an idea I can buy?” But the second question is, “Does the author of this letter seem like someone I could work with?”
(Blake, the Charleston Cats missed you in Isle of Palms this year–hope you can make our retreat next time.)
Which is best, the query letter or a treatment? I’m still confused on this issue. Thanks Blake!
My personal rule is to always begin with a query letter. Yes, you can give the short pitch for your project in the query. But since a good treatment will run a few pages, don’t even send that until they ask for it. Keep the query letter as short as you can – I’d say not going over two pages at most. One page is the best – that way all your information is all together; nothing can get separated or lost or otherwise disconnected. It’s all on one sheet.
TO: Blake Snyder, Chairman of STC Productions.
Dear Blake:
My name is Salvador Rubio and surely you’ll remember me from that nice Cat!Alonians seminar we had in Spain.
As an avid reader of your Cat! Books, software and blog, I thought you would like to know that I’ve written a family-oriented comedy about a too ambitious spanish writer who, to avoid being dumped by his impatient girlfriend, must perform a high-profile sale in Hollywood, confronting a mad executive who secretly wants to drown the studio making big-budget auteur movies.
Let me remind you that for five years I’ve been a story analyst for some of the most important production companies in Spain, so I have experience working in development projects.
Should you be interested, please dial 1-555-HIRE-ME and I’ll be happy to meet you at your convenience.
Regards,
S.R.
;)
Now, seriously, this is how I do it:
4 paragraphs max. First one for a short introducion and personal connections (if any). Second one for praising (this lets them know you know them and their work, and that the letter is not the same for everybody) and your short logline. Be funny if it’s a comedy, be solemn if it’s a drama (easy to say- few people do it). Third for additional relevant facts about yourself or the script (actors involved, personal achievements, etc) and fourth for a nice goodbye and brief contact info.
Make it personal. Show you know them. Create rapport. Take your time. And of course:
Let them take their time.
Blake, the logline approach you had helped the most … but we’ll see if interest turns into sales.
Any word on the release date of your new book? I would like to pre-order it before Christmas. Love your first 2 books and ready for 2 more!
Hey Blake. so sorry I missed you charging them up at expo! Thanks as always for the advice (this time on query letters)
Claire